One moms journey through life wondering "am I doing this right?"

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Ten Things Autism Has Taught Me

1) Patience- We all wish we had more of it. Since Angelina's diagnosis I can honestly say I have improved greatly in this area. I must speak softly, expect to repeat things often. I know I have to take a deep breathe some days when she has meltdowns, spills her food on the floor, poops in her pants. I know the day may be filled with the unexpected. Patience helps ( so does her bedtime and a nice glass of wine).

2) We all need help- Over the last few years I have met many new, good friends in the Autism community. So many are new to this world and need help. I try my best to inform new parents of autistic children what helped me and what I learned through my experiences. I love to talk to mothers and fathers about our struggles. I love to learn and share. I hope we can all benefit  from each other.

3)Ignorance and Awareness is everywhere- Everyday I am amazed how many people know so little about Autism. Why? It's everywhere. I hope people want to know and learn about it. I know awareness is the only hope for improving our kids lives. On the same note I meet people often who know Angelina is different and really try to care and help and WANT to connect with her. That's awesome
.
4)Don't judge a book by its cover- I pride myself as someone who always cared for the odd kid. I had friends from all different groups...nerds, jocks, dropouts. Some of the people you meet in life who are most different from you, can be the ones who will teach you the most about life.  I want to always be able to say I made the effort and time to get to know someone. You may be surprised who could be one of your best buddies.

5)Feeling sorry for myself or my daughter will get me nowhere- Yeah..I learned this one pretty quickly. Get to it. My husband constantly reminds me of this on my weak days. I have to much to learn and do for us. Anyway, most days I truly feel I have one of the most special, beautiful daughters in the world. What's too feel sorry about?

6)Smell the roses everyday- Life's crazy. Plain and simple. The rat race, schedules, money issues....yuk!!! I want to enjoy the plain simple beauties of life....namely my family, a cup of coffee, flowers and a good reality show!!

7)Trust thy neighbor and ask for help- Yep. I believe I am still working on this. Trusting people who can help my Angelina. That's a hard one for me. Half the people I talk to everyday are just about as clueless as I am on Autism. That may not be entirely fair. I know that are a few who really have helped us. I keeping trying the trust thing everyday in some new way. And help...we often need it a lot. Sometimes just from pure exhaustion. I need to continue working on the HELP thing. I am really trying.

8)Crying is okay- Yeah I know I said in #5 feeling sorry will get me no where but a good cry now and then feels good. I often just need to shed a few tears and then get back to reality. Emotions are real.

9)Surprises are not always fun- Angelina needs a lot of structure. She can have a bad moment some days if we take a wrong street home. I am a planner and proud of it. I want to be prepared wherever we go. I got the extra clothes and specific food, books, toys, wipes, music. My husband may disagree ( he does) but Autistic children told handle change very well. Transitioning is not easy. Yes...we try to expose her to new, different things often. But I still like having my stash and being
prepared.

10)Go with your gut- I know my daughter best. No doubt. I know if something is wrong even when she can't speak it to me. I will always trust my gut instincts. They have helped me too often over the last few years. Words are something of a luxury for us....I truly communicate with Angelina in some many other ways than with words. Yeah...enough said here.

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